


Insomniac

by Saereneth



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, Insomnia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-20
Updated: 2017-03-20
Packaged: 2018-10-08 07:13:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10381371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saereneth/pseuds/Saereneth
Summary: Some part of Shiro told him he was being irrational, or at least impractical; he couldn’t avoid sleep forever. But every time he closed his eyes he feared he'd open them to find some fresh hell awaiting him, dreaded being told he'd lost even more time.A year and change to the Galra.A crash landing and an isolation ward on Earth.Four kids and the fate of the universe in their hands, a legend come to life. Voltron. A few months that felt like a lifetime.A battle, a victory, a void.Ten years.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BossToaster (ChaoticReactions)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChaoticReactions/gifts).



> So, the lovely @bosstoaster (You’ve read all of her fics, right? No? Go on, I’ll wait.) responded to this prompt:
> 
> “ HERE’S A THOUGHT FOR YOU, WHEN SHIRO COMES BACK FROM WHEREVER HE VANISHED TO, FOR HIM IT’S ONLY BEEN LIKE AN HOUR BUT FOR EVERYONE ELSE IT’S BEEN LIKE FIVE YEARS OR MAYBE EVEN A DECADE?”
> 
> The result is the fic Come Back (as pure as gold) which, if you haven’t read, wtf are you even doing with your life? Go do that immediately.
> 
> I loved the shit out of this fic, and I asked BT if I could play in her sandbox. She is a gracious and kind overlord, and she said yes! So, I wrote a thing.

The castle ship didn't feel that different late at night when all the lights were dimmed. 

Wandering the hallways while the others slept, Shiro honestly didn't know whether the familiarity was a blessing or a curse. It was a little eerie, especially when he was so tired-- He almost expected to wake up and find that it'd all been a dream. His reality had begun to blur at the edges yet again, and every time he closed his eyes he feared he'd open them to find some fresh hell awaiting him, dreaded being told he'd lost even more time.

A year and change to the Galra.

A crash landing and an isolation ward on Earth.

Four kids and the fate of the universe in their hands, a legend come to life. Voltron. A few months that felt like a lifetime.

A battle, a victory, a void.

Ten years.

Ten years.

Some part of Shiro told him he was being irrational, or at least impractical; he couldn't avoid sleep forever. He'd already succumbed a few times since his return, and nothing more had changed between sleeping and waking. Knowing that didn't lessen his fear at all. He'd had no reason to expect to lose so much any of the other times things had gone sideways, either.

Even when he could force his waking mind to believe he'd be okay, Shiro's dreams kept him from getting anything like truly restful sleep. He'd thought the nightmares of the arena were bad, and they were. But now they stacked with visions of waking to find his friends, his family aged far beyond him. He dreamt of their bones turned to dust while he lived on with no anchor but the Black Lion. 

Shiro hadn't touched the bond with Black since returning to the Castle of Lions nearly ten years after leaving for that fight. Their bond had been so close those last few moments he'd lost all sense of himself as a single entity, melding into the Lion's being. He was terrified that if he were to open himself to that bond again, he'd be subsumed entirely into Black's vast consciousness. 

Ten years was barely a blink to a being as old and timeless as Black. What if his deepened bond with her was what had thrown him out of the progression of time? None of the other paladins had bonded as deeply with the Black Lion as Shiro had, but they didn't seem to have suffered for it in the decade of his absence. He’d been told that forming Voltron had been a rare occurrence, but that was more due to the lack of a permanent fifth pilot than anything else. Shiro’s test flights with Green had been going well so far, and Yellow was still willing to let him try piloting. He could still help his team form Voltron.

At least, that’s what he hoped. With Zarkon out of the picture, there was no reason for anyone to risk a deeper bond with the Black Lion. Keith’s bond with her should be strong enough to let them form Voltron; all Shiro had to do was bond with Green or, failing that, Yellow.

He’d taught first-year cadets at the Garrison for years before the Kerberos mission-- he was more than capable of ignoring the mental eye-roll he felt from his nascent bond with the Green Lion at that thought.

Shoving his irritation beneath the roiling ocean of his thoughts, Shiro chewed his lower lip to keep himself from grumbling out loud, so determined not to acknowledge Green that he walked right into her paladin as he whipped around a corner in the hallway he’d been pacing.

“Ack!” Pidge yelped, shaking her head and squinting up at Shiro.

Shiro groaned, bringing his right hand up to rub his face. “God, Pidge, I’m sorry.” He broke her gaze, scowling down at his Galra hand right before it touched his face. The arm jerked down and back, away from Pidge, while Shiro shifted uncomfortably on his feet. She hadn’t gotten much taller in the years he’d been gone, but something in her gaze made him feel small in a way he hadn’t in a long time.

“It’s fine, Shiro, don’t worry about it,” Pidge replied as she continued to eye him. “You, on the other hand, do not seem fine. What’s with that?”

“I am fine!” he hastened to assure her. He thought it probably would have been more convincing had his voice not cracked slightly in the middle of the sentence. 

Pidge stared at him, her expression morphing from concern to flat disbelief. “Uh huh. Sure. That explains why you look like a B-movie zombie and why Green’s pestering me about taking care of you.”

It was unfair for the Lions to talk to the other paladins about him. That had to be against some sort of code, somewhere. “I’m just tired, Pidge.” Time to pull out enough truth to hopefully escape this conversation. “I don’t always sleep well, and staying in my bunk staring at my eyelids wasn’t doing me any favors.”

Pidge made a soft sound, moving closer to him and reaching out with one hand. Slim fingers wrapped around Shiro’s flesh wrist and he couldn’t stop a tiny gasp from escaping his mouth.

“Is it the nightmares?” she asked gently.

Shiro’s eyes fluttered shut. He’d never admit the nightmares to the Katie he knew, but then, the Katie he knew wouldn’t have asked about them so directly, either. These older versions of his paladins were bolder and blunter, but they were also wiser. They’d cared just as passionately when they were his, but the years had given them the experience to understand the pains of war.

He wished more than anything he could have spared them that.

“Shiro?”

Shiro jumped, blinking wet eyes open to look down at Pidge once more. Big amber eyes stared back at him from under furrowed brows. She stepped closer, rising up on her toes and slowly bringing her hands to his face, using her thumbs to wipe away wetness he hadn’t realized was there.

“C’mon, Shiro,” Pidge said, grabbing his wrist again and turning down the hall. “I have an idea.”

They walked quietly back through the castle ship, towards the hallway holding the paladin quarters. Shiro started to protest that he wasn’t ready to return to his empty room, too uncomfortable with disturbing what seemed more like a memorial shrine than a living space, but they continued right past the familiar rooms. Pidge stopped at a door halfway down the next hallway over, pressing her palm against the keypad and pulling him into a room he’d never seen before.

Though the room was unfamiliar to him, it was clear it had seen a lot of use in the years he’d been gone. Pillows and cushions were stacked high on couches and chairs throughout the room, with folded blankets poking out from various places. While most of the ship had metal floors, this room had a large, soft looking carpet in warm colors covering most of the floor. The lights were also unusual for the castle ship-- while most of the Altean fixtures were blue, the lights in this room were a warmer shade of white, almost like candlelight. 

The most noticeable feature of the room, however, was a massive four-poster bed made from what appeared to be wood. Shiro had no idea where one would get a bed this size-- it looked like it could hold everyone living in the castle comfortably and still have room for guests. Like the couches and chairs, it was piled high with pillows and blankets in rich colors. Shiro was sure his mouth was hanging open, and a glance at the smug look on Pidge’s face confirmed that he must look pretty ridiculous. 

“It’s pretty great, right?” she asked, grinning unrepentantly.

“Pidge,” he whispered, not sure if he was awed or shocked. “What even is this?”

“Oh, it’s just the orgy room.”

After several minutes of sputtering on Shiro’s part and a few hard whacks on the back from Pidge, she finally stopped cackling long enough to clarify.

“Okay, okay, it’s not an orgy room. Calm your tits, honestly,” she huffed, still snickering every few words at Shiro’s brilliantly red face. “Though, it should be. We set it up for when people need to have others nearby. Sometimes when you’re injured, or when something goes wrong, you just need your family close. We stayed in here for months after we found my family, and again when Mom joined us. There’s plenty of room for cuddles, and plenty of space to be nearby but not cuddling if you’re weirdly protective of your ‘personal space bubble’ like Matt.”

Shiro snorted at that. Matt’s preferred definition of personal space had made things interesting on the way to Kerberos.

“That makes sense,” Shiro allowed, feeling something inside himself relax at seeing a room filled with things that looked like they could be from Earth. “But why are we here?”

“Because we’re sleeping, idiot.” He could practically feel the force of her eye roll. It would have been funny if he weren’t busy being horribly uncomfortable.

“Katie, I don’t think that’s really appro--”

“Shiro, don’t ‘Katie’ me on this. We’re sleeping together, in a bed, because you are exhausted and can’t sleep alone and I know what that feels like.”

“It’s still hardly--”

“As for being appropriate, I’d remind you that we’re less than a year apart in age now. I’m 24, and I’ve been fighting a war for almost half my life; I think I’m adult enough to platonically sleep with a friend who’s having a rough time. Unless you think I’m going to take advantage of you?”

“What? Of course not, no, but Pidge…”

“Okay, so what’s the problem?”

Shiro sighed and fought the urge to cross his arms or blow his bangs out of his eyes. Acting like a teenager certainly wasn’t going to help his case, and if he was honest with himself, she was right. There was nothing inappropriate about cuddling with Pidge; it was just awkward, and he felt a little ashamed that he couldn’t manage to sleep properly on his own.

“There… isn’t one, I guess. It’s just that you shouldn’t have to.”

Pidge sighed, walking fully into the room and sitting down on the edge of the bed. “Shiro, I don’t have to do anything, we both know that.” She patted the bed next to her invitingly, giving him a hopeful look. Slowly, taking his time to examine the room on his way, he made it over and sat down carefully.

“I don’t want you to feel obligated to take care of me,” he murmured, staring at his boots in the carpet.

“Shiro,” Pidge replied, leaning into his side. “You have never, ever felt like an obligation to me. And… after missing you for so long, we all just want to make you feel safe, to make sure you are safe.”

Shiro sighed, leaning back against the tiny woman at his side. He couldn’t imagine how he’d feel if he’d had to continue for a decade without knowing what happened to them. He’d probably never let them out of his sight again.

“Okay,” he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> Shiro is the little spoon, and it's adorable.


End file.
